Craven's Journal - Page 2


I don't even know where to begin. I don't even know what I really expected when I asked to participate in that mission. Sure, I *knew* the risks, but did I really understand them? Did I really understand what exactly could happen down there? Was I trying to prove something to myself? To Jesse? To Amalina? To the Marines? I don't know. I just really don't know. And it worries me.

6 Dead.

I couldn't help them. Couldn't save them. Sure, I understand that I had other priorities, but that doesn't change things. I try to blame the Toasters, but I find myself thinking that maybe, just maybe, I might have been able to do more. Might have been able to handle it different. I'll never know now and to each … I'm sorry and may the Gods be with you.

7 Wounded.

At least I was able to save a couple. Two pilots and a young girl. I just .. feel like I should have been able to do more for them. My heart keeps telling me I did the best I could, considering being injured myself .. but my head tells me that I frakked up. That I got lucky and I hope to God that this isn't the case.

I'm going to go check on the Pilots. See how they are doing. Make sure they are alright. Doc's taken over their care .. probably for the best.

~ Joran

PS: Maybe, just maybe, Page 3 will hopefully hold something a little happier. I can hope, right?

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