Greje

Greje

Milla Jovovich as Greje Diomed Karthasi

Name:	Greje Diomed Karthasi
Callsign:	{$callsign}
AKA:	Padre; Chap; Sister Karthasi
Age:	27
Branch:	Navy
Faction:	Military
Organization:	{$organization}
Department:	Support Department
Position:	Chaplain
Rank:	Lieutenant
Ship:	Genesis
Homeworld:	Caprica
Actor:	Milla Jovovich

No! I am not Prince Hamlet, nor was meant to be.

Am an attendant lord, one that will do
To swell a progress, start a scene or two
Advise the prince; no doubt, an easy tool,
Deferential, glad to be of use,
Politic, cautious, and meticulous;
Full of high sentence, but a bit obtuse;
At times, indeed, almost ridiculous—
Almost, at times, the Fool.

-T.S. Eliot

Greje is typically pronounced 'GRAY.' However, the final 'e' can optionally be pronounced as a weak schwa when her name's spoken before another word beginning in a consonant. GRAYuh karTHAWsee, e.g. Her middle name, Diomed, ends in a dental, which is left unvoiced if it ends a sentence (Diomet rather than Diomed).

'Greje' is a Caprican word for a type of songbird.

'Diomed' is from one of the common scriptural dialects. Its basic components are 'God/Gods' and 'Guard.' Do the Gods guard her, or does she guard them? Likely both.

'Karthasi' is from another, very rare scriptural dialect. It means 'The New City' and refers to the mythical place to which the few heroes who survived the great cyclical wars of Kobol re-located.

Greje is known, in the religious community, as a Caprican Academic— these two words attaining almost the rank of an obscenity among certain Gemenese priests, just as the term 'Gemenese Fundie' is likely to make an Academic flinch. She takes a scientific view toward her work, hers is not to blindly follow the literal word of the scriptures, but to interpret it as a collection of metaphysical texts out of which some basic knowledge of man's place in the universe may be gleaned.

This isn't to say that ritual isn't important to her. It is. Like the texts, the ritual is a code to be deciphered and interpreted. But unless the code is pure, the decipherment is meaningless, and so she faithfully executes the rites — at this point in fear of the knowledge of their practice dying out, especially those rites which it is forbidden to record in a physical form, such as the mysteries of Dionysus (the feral rites), Demeter (the Koric rites), and Aphrodite (the Hysteria).

She's served in a large number of sanctuaries and temples, both while in seminary and afterward. The longest she ever served in one place was an eight-month stint at a temple of Aphrodite on Leonis. But the rites of Aphrodite are certainly pleasant (she -is- the Goddess of Pleasant Things), and the priestling had always put the pursuit of male affection after her studies, which were copious and all-consuming, so, really, who could blame her? She served briefly (about three weeks) at a sanctuary of Artemis, as well, but remained unindoctrinated in the performance of the high rites, since they can only be performed by a virgin, male or female.

She went into a military venue because she had kept waiting to get 'the call' from one of the Lords, calling her into the service of one or the other so that she could settle down at one temple or sanctuary— but no call ever came. It was enough to make her a little insecure about her faith, for a while, but she finally decided to go to a place where her ability to serve the needs of people who follow any cult at all would come in handy. She figured after two or four years travelling the stars she'd have had time to do some research and meditation and figure out where she belonged.

It turned out that the Lords evidently had a plan for her, after all. Suddenly the years of being spiritually unfulfilled all make sense. If she had been called into the service of one Lord or the other, she wouldn't have been indoctrinated into so many of the varied rites that belong to the various cults. And she certainly wouldn't be out floating in space, protecting that knowledge from extinction in a suddenly otherwise strange and hostile world.

Aside from her priestly endeavors, her '15 minutes of fame' came in her senior year at university, when she took fourth place at planetary for college-grade boxing. She had been ranked twenty-seventh the year before, and all of her friends joked that she was destined to become a priest of Ares.

Recently canonized trivia:

Greje was blacklisted as a heretic by the Gemenese religious authorities and was officially Persona Non Grata on the planet. She learned this when she attempted to go to Gemenon on a pilgrimage her last year in Seminary. She was fortunate that the Captain of the transport caught the blacklisting before landing. She's recently found out from Dane that, yes, they did actually burn heretics on Gemenon.

Distinguishing Features

• Mild Caprican Accent
• Tendency to fold up into small spaces (1/2 Priest, 1/2 Umbrella, 1/2 Monkey)
• Tendency to walk into walls (Make that 1/2 Blind Monkey)
• A nigh-constant case of the fidgities which only seems to abate for her priestly duties (1/2 Blind Monkey on Crack)
• Utter Geekdom

Skills

• Cult Practices
• Scriptural Interpretation
• Herbal 'Remedies'
• Boxing
• Pyramid

Ritual Garb of Apollo	Robes of Aphrodite	Ritual Garb of Ares	Dionysiac Garb
Robes of Hera	Robes of Athena	Robes of Demeter	Ritual Garb of Zeus
Robes of Poseidon	Robes of Hades	Robes of Hermes	Robes of Artemis

The Chaplain Has Been Hitting The Chamalla Way Too Hard:

Playlist

Basket Case

Do you have the time
To listen to me whine
About nothing and everything
All at once?
I am one of those
Melodramatic fools:
Neurotic to the bone,
No doubt about it.

Sometimes I give myself the creeps.
Sometimes my mind plays tricks on me.
It all keeps adding up.
I think I'm cracking up.
Am I just paranoid?
Or am I just stoned?

Human

I did my best to notice
When the call came down the line.
Up to the platform of surrender
I was brought, but I was kind.

And sometimes I get nervous
When I see an open door.
Close your eyes, clear your heart,
Cut the cord.

Are we human or are we dancer?
My sign is vital, my hands are cold.
And I'm on my knees looking for the answer—
Are we human or are we dancer?

Unwell

I'm not crazy, I'm just a little unwell;
I know, right now you can't tell.
But stay awhile and maybe then you'll see
A different side of me.
I'm not crazy, I'm just a little impaired;
I know, right now you don't care.
But soon enough you're gonna think of me
And how I used to be.
Me.
Talking to myself in public.
Dodging glances on the train.
I know.
I know they've all been talking 'bout me.
I can hear them whisper.
And it makes me think there must be something wrong
With me.
Out of all the hours thinking
Somehow
I've lost my mind.

You're So Real

Yes I am.
I hope you think you beat me.
Hope I start talking crazy
Before you understand me.
Are we through?
You think that I'm beneath you.
But you like the things that I do.
Wrap em up and take em with you.

I'm alright.
Hope I can sleep for one night.
If not to cool my insides,
Maybe to calm my bad side.
Rain on me.
I got a weakness in me.
I think that weakness feeds me.
I don't think you think you need me.
Sunshine, you're the best time
I ever, ever had.
But I think I made you feel bad—
A black fly on your necktie
Time after time.

Dream Somehow

Life is a dream somehow.
Life is a game that is ruled with an iron fist.
Life is a broken nose.
Life is a silent smile and a virgin's kiss.
Come to the rescue now.

Tomorrow may change,
But it may never come.
Tomorrow may change,
But it may never come.
Turn around, turn around, turn around,
What do you see?

Come to the rescue now.
Come to the rescue before all our worlds collide.
Life is a dream somehow.
Life is a speck of dust lodged in God's eye.
Life is a dream somehow.

Come to the rescue now.
Come with a mission and come with a broken heart.
Life is a dream somehow.
Life is a dream and our lives are a world apart.

Glory Be

Like a bad dream I once had where
Everyone but me knew something:
Walking blind through the burning fields,
The dead brigade is on my heels.
They follow me—they follow me.

Water's flowing through my veins.
Nothing ever stays the same.
Through eyes that once were blind with passion
Everything looks soft and grey.
Without color or rough edges,
Without fire to burn the skin,
Without pride and without reason,
Water turns to wine again.

Water's flowing through my veins.
Tell me now it's all the same.
Tell me that it doesn't matter.
Tell me everything's alright.

Cast Your Pod To The Wind

Twirl, twirl, twirl, spin,
Extend your limbs, spin,
Spin, ever faster—
Cast your pod to the wind.

Round, round, round,
Feel the breeze, it's
Free, free, relax
Your grip and
Cast your pod to the wind.

Disregard the expense and
Disengage from the sense
And liberate your pod and let it go.

Fly, fly, fly, let
The pod become a speck
In the sky and
Cast your pod to the wind.

Whistling in the Dark

A man came up to me and said,
"I'd like to change your mind
By hitting it with a rock," he said
"Though I am not unkind."
We laughed at his little joke
And then I happily walked away
And hit my head on the wall of the jail
Where the two of us live today.

There's only one thing that I know how to do well
And I've often been told that you only can do
What you know how to do well—
And that's be you;
Be what you're like;
Be like yourself.
And so I'm having a wonderful time
But I'd rather be whistling in the dark.

The World's Addess

I know you deceived me.
Couldn't sleep last night.
Now my tearstains on the wall reflect an ugly sight.
I can see your secrets.
No need to confess.
Everyone looks naked when you know the world's address.

The world's address.
A place that's worn.
A sad pun that reflects a sadder mess.
I'll repeat it for those who may not have already guessed—
The world's address.

Call the men of science
And let them hear this song.
Tell them Albert Einstein and Copernicus were wrong:

The world's address.
A place that's worn.
A sad pun that reflects a sadder mess.
I'll repeat it for those who may not have already guessed—
The world's address.

Where Your Eyes Don't Go

Every jumbled pile of person has a thinking part
that wonders what the part that isn't thinking isn't thinking of.
Should you worry when the skullhead is in front of you,
Or is it worse because it's always waiting
Where your eyes don't go?

Where your eyes don't go a part of you is hovering.
It's a nightmare that you'll never be discovering.
You're free to come and go
Or talk like Kurtis Blow.
But there's a pair of eyes in back of your head.

Where your eyes don't go a filthy scarecrow waves its broomstick arms
And does a parody of each unconscious thing you do.
When you turn around to look, it's gone behind you—
On its face it's wearing your confused expression
Where your eyes don't go.

Hovering Sombrero

Hey, hovering sombrero,
Gently waving in the air above the meadow,
Softly floating in the sky outside the window,
Hovering sombrero, don't be shy.
Don't.
Don't be shy.
Don't be terrified. (don't)
When you take yourself for granted, (don't)
Feel rejected and unwanted, know
You're never just a hat, (no)
You're never only just a hat, you know. (no)

Time is flying like an arrow.
And the clock hands go so fast, they make the wind blow.
And it makes the pages of the calendar go
Flying out the window, one by one.
'Til 100 years are on the front lawn (no)
And the old, familiar things are mostly all gone.
But the old sombrero just keeps hovering on (no)
Hovering sombrero, hover on.

Don't be burdened by regrets or make (no)
Your failures an obsession
Or become embittered or possessed by ruined hopes. (no no)
Remember, when you take yourself for granted (no)
Feel rejected and unwanted, know (no)
You're never just a hat (no)
You're never only just a hat, you know. (no)

Lie Still, Little Bottle

Lie still, little bottle, and shake my shaky hand.
Black coffee's not enough for me, I need a better friend.
One pill at the bottom is singing my favorite song.
I know I must investigate.
I hope that I can sing along.

"There's no time for metaphors," cried the little pill to me
He said, "Life is a placebo masquerading as a simile."
Well, I knew that pill was lying—
Too gregarious, too nice.
But as he walked I had to sing this twice.

Johnny Head-In-Air

Once with head as high as ever
Johnny walked beside the river.
Johnny watched the swallows trying
Which was the cleverest at flying.

Oh what fun, oh what fun,
Johnny watched the bright round sun
Going in and coming out.
That was all he thought about.

So he strode on, only think,
To the river’s river’s very brink.
Where the bank was high and steep
And the water water very deep.

And the fishes in a row
Stared to see him coming coming so.
One more step, oh sad to tell:
Headlong in Johnny fell.

Black Hole Sun

Stuttering
Cold and damp
Steal the warm wind
Tired friend
Times are gone
For honest men
And sometimes
Far too long
For snakes
In my shoes
A walking sleep
And my youth
I pray to keep
Heaven send
Hell away
No one sings
Like you
Anymore

Lump

Lump was limp and lonely and needed a shove.
Lump slipped on a kiss and tumbled into love.
She spent her twenties between the sheets.
Life limped along at subsonic speeds.

Sons and Daughters

When we arrive,
Sons & daughters,
We'll make our homes on the water.
We'll build our walls— aluminum.
We'll fill our lives with cinnamon. Now—

These currents pull us
'cross the border.
Steady your boats,
Arms to shoulder.
'Till tides are pulled,
Hold our grounds,
Making this cold harbor, now, home.

Take up your arms,
Sons and daughters.
We will arise from the bunkers.
By land, by sea, by dirigible—
We'll leave our tracks untraceable. Now.

The Statue Got Me High

The stone, it called to me
(and now I see the things the stone has shown to me).
A rock that spoke a word
(an animated mineral, it can be heard).

And though I once preferred a human being's company,
It failed before the monolith that towers over me.

The statue got me high,
The statue got me high,
The truth is where the sculptor's chisel chipped away the lie.

Sister Karthasi has a dirty little secret.

Is It:

Choose One.

A

Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder.

B

An Allergy to Dating.

C

A serious addiction to bad, bad Caprican Pop Music. Like, really bad Caprican Pop Music.

D

An undying notion that her scripture jokes are actually funny.

E

All of the Above.

Thanks to Quill for the lovely rendering of Greje in Aphrodite's robes!